


Study the Bottom of My Boot

by chainsawdog



Series: Order Abandoned [8]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-14
Updated: 2016-05-14
Packaged: 2018-06-08 07:56:01
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,268
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6846055
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chainsawdog/pseuds/chainsawdog
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Anakin and Obi-Wan are on their way to Coruscant after their campaign on Geonosis. Neither of them can sleep - Anakin is too worried, Obi-Wan simply isn't tired. They have some time for a conversation. </p><p>After the events of Legacy of Terror, during Brain Invaders.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Study the Bottom of My Boot

“I was so worried about you, Master.”  
  
Old habits were hard to break. Sometimes Anakin fell back into the habit of calling Obi-Wan Master. Sometimes he didn’t notice himself doing it.  
  
“I wish we hadn’t come back to Geonosis,” Anakin turned his face away from Obi-Wan, clenching his fists. His shoulders were tense, and he was getting a headache.  
  
“Any campaign could be our last, Anakin,” Obi-Wan replied. “You know that as well as I.”  
  
They were en route to Coruscant, transporting their Geonosian prisoner, Archduke Poggle the Lesser. Jedi Masters Ki-Adi Mundi and Luminara Unduli travelled with them, along with a contingent of clones.  
  
In their room, it was quiet. Anakin and Obi-Wan were dressed for sleep, but it evaded them. Obi-Wan was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling. Anakin had given up on sleep as well, and was busying himself by tinkering with his mechanical arm.  
  
“I don’t want this fear,” Anakin said quietly. “It doesn’t help anyone.”  
  
“Anakin, it’s natural to feel fear,” said Obi-Wan. He rolled on his side to look at Anakin. “It’s how you react to it that determines what kind of Jedi you are.”  
  
Anakin looked up at him. “I only kept control because I had Ahsoka with me,” he said quietly.  
  
Obi-Wan regarded him carefully. “What do you mean, Anakin?”  
  
Keeping his gaze steady, Anakin answered in a low voice. “I would have killed every last Geonosian to keep you safe.”  
  
Obi-Wan blinked, then looked away. “You know I wouldn’t want that, Anakin,” he replied softly. “Why would you even think that?”  
  
Anakin had known Obi-Wan wouldn’t understand.  
  
“Because if I lost you –” Anakin’s voice caught in his throat, and he clenched his jaw. Tears welled in his eyes as he struggled to finish his sentence. “If I lost you, I would lose myself.”  
  
Obi-Wan sat up.  
  
“What do you mean?”  
  
Anakin shook his head. If he spoke now, he’d start crying.  
  
Obi-Wan hesitated a moment, then stood. Walking to Anakin’s side, he sat down on the bed next to him. Hesitantly, he put a hand on Anakin’s leg and looked into his eyes.  
  
“If… something happened to me, Anakin…” He spoke hesitantly, watching Anakin for a reaction. “I would not want you to avenge me. It would change nothing.”  
  
Suddenly, Anakin grabbed Obi-Wan in a tight hug. Obi-Wan, still bruised from his crash at Point Rain, yelped in pain. Anakin released him, putting one hand on his cheek and the other on his shoulder.  
  
“I’m so sorry,” he said quietly. “I forgot.”  
  
Obi-Wan smiled. He touched the hand on his face gently. “It’s okay,” he said.  
  
Anakin pressed his forehead against Obi-Wan’s, tears rolling down his cheeks. Obi-Wan placed a hand on the back of Anakin’s neck, and closed his eyes. Anakin’s hands were in Obi-Wan’s hair, his shoulders shaking with his quiet sobs. Obi-Wan put his arms around Anakin, and Anakin rested his head on Obi-Wan’s shoulder, crying openly now.  
  
As a child, Anakin had learned to cry as quietly as possible. As a slave on Tatooine the only place he and his mother had been truly safe was their home, and that wasn’t even really theirs. When he had cried there, Shmi would hold him close and talk to him, stroking his hair. When she had cried, he would sit with her quietly, holding her hand.  
  
As an initiate of the Jedi Order, Anakin hadn’t let anyone see him cry. He was already too different to the other Jedi. He wouldn’t let them know his weaknesses.  
  
Padmé had been there, after his mother’s death. She had held him as he wept, despite his rage. Force, he loved her so dearly.  
  
Now, he sobbed onto Obi-Wan’s tunic, taking hitching breaths when he could, allowing Obi-Wan to hold him. This was something he had never looked for. Something he had never imagined. Obi-Wan comforting him.  
  
When Anakin finally managed to catch his breath, he pulled away. Obi-Wan kept his hands on Anakin’s shoulders, and looked at him.  
  
“I’m sorry,” said Anakin, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand.  
  
“For what?” asked Obi-Wan. “Crying? You obviously needed to, Anakin.”  
  
“But I should be stronger than this,” Anakin said softly.  
  
Obi-Wan placed two fingers beneath Anakin’s chin, and kissed Anakin. Anakin leaned into the kiss, pulling Obi-Wan closer to him, gripping his tunic. He moved erratically; breaking from the kiss to take a breath, then diving back for more. Obi-Wan’s hands tangled in his hair, and he made soft noises that raised the hairs on the back of Anakin’s neck. Anakin forced himself to slow down, remembering that Obi-Wan was injured. He pulled away, and traced his thumb along one of the still-healing scars on Obi-Wan’s cheek.  
  
“I’m okay, Anakin,” Obi-Wan said gently, taking Anakin’s hand in his.  
  
Anakin tugged at Obi-Wan’s tunic with his free hand.  
  
Obi-Wan looked at him.  
  
“I need to see,” Anakin said. His hand was trembling. “I want to see that you’re okay.”  
  
Obi-Wan smiled wryly. “If I couldn’t sense your feelings, Anakin, I would think that you were up to something.”  
  
“Please,” Anakin said softly.  
  
Obi-Wan nodded. Slowly, cautiously, Anakin pulled Obi-Wan’s tunic over his head. Anakin bit his lip in worry as he saw the extent of the damage. There were small, red scratches all over Obi-Wan’s shoulders and chest, and he was wrapped in white bandages.  
  
“I’m sorry,” Anakin said.  
  
Obi-Wan glanced at Anakin’s mechanical hand. “We’ve both experienced worse, Anakin. The med droid said I would be fine.”  
  
Anakin traced a finger lightly across Obi-Wan’s collarbone. “You’re lucky nothing else was broken.”  
  
Obi-Wan grimaced. “Actually,” he said. “I’ve fractured my shin bone. Along with two broken ribs.”  
  
Anakin kissed Obi-Wan’s shoulder, then his neck. Sitting back, he put his hand gently on Obi-Wan’s thigh. Obi-Wan rested his hand on Anakin’s.  
  
“Let’s never go back to Geonosis,” Anakin said softly.  
  
Obi-Wan scowled. “But then I’ll never get the chance to study those parasites –”  
  
Anakin laughed.  
  
“What?” Obi-Wan looked genuinely puzzled.  
  
“No, Obi-Wan,” Anakin said, smiling. “I am not going anywhere _near_ those nightmares again. I’m just grateful we all got out of there alive.”  
  
“You could have at least left _one_ for me to study.”  
  
Anakin’s smile turned fond as he looked at Obi-Wan. “I think there’s still some on the bottom of my boot.”  
  
“Oh, _ha ha_ , Anakin,” Obi-Wan said. “That wasn’t funny the first time –”  
  
Anakin interrupted him with a kiss. Obi-Wan melted into his embrace, smiling.  
  
They broke apart a moment before the door slid open. Anakin glanced over his shoulder to see Rex, standing in the doorway.  
  
Anakin smiled. “Oh, hey Rex,” he said.  
  
Rex stood to attention, back straight, shoulders squared, heels together. “Sir,” he said.  
  
“At ease, Rex,” Anakin said, standing. Rex relaxed, and Obi-Wan hurried to put his shirt back on. “What’s the word?”  
  
“Generals Unduli and Mundi need to speak with you and General Kenobi,” said Rex. “They’re on the bridge.”  
  
“Thank you, Rex,” said Anakin. “We’ll be there shortly.”  
  
Rex nodded to Anakin. He started to leave the room, then paused. Turning back to them, he said, “This may be out of line, but I believe you two should exercise more caution in…” he looked between the two of them, then coughed into his hand. “Well, you understand me. Maybe lock your door in the future, sirs.”  
  
Anakin grinned. Obi-Wan’s face turned red.  
  
“We’ll keep that in mind,” Anakin said, glancing at Obi-Wan. “Well, no time like the present, old man.” He offered a hand to Obi-Wan, and helped him to his feet. “Let’s go see what the emergency is.”


End file.
